I am currently enjoying a hiatus in my day long sneeze-o-thon which started in the bath yesterday. I am turning into Mr Sneeze, it’s a real pig in a skirt. As Monica will tell you, if you take her by the hand and sing to her “Tell me about the sneeeeeezing” whilst doing a small jig, I sneeze with all my lungs, no nose control at all. When I have tried to limit the volume and intense physical gyrations that accompany the sorry spasms I trade intensity for number and the whole process is simply more prolonged and pitiful.
What I have also noticed about the sneezing is that it has become more of an issue since I started singing. I would say that I am in better shape cardio-vascularly than I have ever been before, thanks to all the huffing and bellowing. Bigger lungs, more air, more sneeze. If only I could harness the power somehow. Nostril windmills would be a start. As a matter of fact, nostril windmills for everyone would solve many a power problem. Think of the amount of kinetic energy stored in simple breathing; you could have a battery mounted in a stylish hat, which in turn could be left on a special hat stand which would transmit the electricity generated in the day into a large nasal power reservoir. Collected on a national level British Nasal Power could make us great again. Jobs in the north, the rejuvenation of industry, the return of the Trade Unions, strikes, three day week, a winter of discontent, rolling power cuts, a Slade reunion tour and no milk for the kiddies. UTOPIA!
New string joy today, been to the music shop and bought £7.49 of metallic goodness. New strings are like getting into the perfect temperature bath. John at the music shop took some pictures of us at a gig in the Singleton and I got to see them; they’re a sepia colour and we look pretty cool. You could almost imagine it was the 1950s judging by what I had done with my hair that night. Note to self: must say “Thanyoo verrmush” more often.
Hope to see you all tomorrow.
Exploits of the Frictionless Man as it wanders around the world like some kind of slippery hydra. Music, words and pictures a speciality.
1 comment:
Hope the nasal spasming stops in time for you to be great tomorrow.
Maybe eat more burgers; the big fellah used to swear by it (at least, he did until he left a drug addled corpse bloated with cheeseburgers... a king dead on a porcelein throne that groaned beneath his ample weight).
Still, don't let that put you off.
Thanyoo vermush.
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